Do you think you could beat up your younger self?

The stand-off of the century.

I stare my younger-self in the eyes.

“It’s about time I took you down.” My older self says.

“What the hell do you want from me?” My younger self replies.

“I gotta beat you up. I gotta take you down a notch.”

“What did I do to get beat up by—wait, who are you?”

“I’m your older self.”

“Sorry, what the heck?”

“I’m your older self, I said.”

“O- ok…”

“This guy is absolutely crazy in the head…” my younger self thinks.

“Square up, lad.”

“I’m disappointed in my future self.”

“Ok, here goes.”

Speaker intercoms:

“3!”

“2!”

“1!”

“Fight!”

The challenger, the older one, flexes their non-existing muscles in attempt to intimidate the opponent.

“Look at all the time I put to working out has reaped! Fear my strength!”

The younger one is not impressed.

“Huh? You have about as much as me right now.”

“Shut up! I’m very insecure about how skinny I am.”

“Then why are you flexing?”

“Shut up! I don’t got my AirPods right now, that’s why.”

“…”

The fight continues.

Surprisingly, they finally started to fight.

The first punch by done by the older one, with sloppy technique and a weak arm. It completely missed.

The younger one kicks the older one in the [no specifics] and knocks him to the ground.

The younger one is the victor! What skill.

“How did you beat me?” The older one asks.

“All I had to do was hit you in a weak spot. Your dumb.”

“Because you’re wearing your stupid skinny pants that aren’t going to help you take the brute of the hit for your skinny ass.”

“Ah frick.”

In short, no.

Somehow, I can’t beat a skinny kid even when I spend a lot of time just trying to get strong.

Smh.